blame my gun

(O huwag mo kalabitin ang aking gatilyo)

"The lesson today is how to die..."
Which Strange Little Girl would you be?
You have a strong sense of justice, and believe that ultimately people should pay for their crimes.

Wow Philippines poster family in Corregidor

Ipinagmamalaki kong napapabilang ako sa isang Wow Philippines poster family. Bata pa lang ako, mahilig na ang pamilya ko sa paggala (talagang magsisiksikan kaming 15 magpipinsan sa isang kakarag-karag na Gemini para lang makapaglangoy sa Los Baños noon). Nang tumanda't magsawa sa pansol at buko pie, nagsimula kaming dalhin ng aming mga magulang sa mga malalayong lugar, kayanin man ng aming sasakyan ang matatarik na bulubundukin o tatlong buong araw man kami makipagtitigan sa dagat sakay ng Superferry. Basta, siniguro ng mga magulang ko na masisimsim namin ang ganda ng sariling bansa.

Kaya't bago pa man nila pangahasang ubusin ang ipon at air miles sa mga engrandeng bakasyon sa ibang bansa, maipagmamalaki na nilang nasuyod na namin ang mga isla ng Pilipinas, kahit sabihin na nating hindi ang "totoong" Pilipinas kundi mga sikat na tourist destinations lang. Tuloy, nakaka-relate ako kay Regine Velasquez tuwing kinakanta niya: "Nakarating ka na ba..." Ilocos, Banawe, Pagsanjan, Palawan, Cebu, Bohol, Davao, etcetera. Alam kong marami pang ibang mga magagandang lugar na maipagmamalaki ang bansa (tulad ng Camiguin at iba pang lugar sa Mindanao na sabik akong mapuntahan), pero marami-marami na rin kaming nalakbayan.

Ito ang dahilan kung bakit hindi na-impress ang kapatid ko nang mag-honeymoon sila ng kanyang asawa sa Boracay. Kasi, kapag natunton mo na ang mga tagong beach sa Bohol at Palawan, eh tiyak na talbog ang mga mas sikat na beach kahit saan sa mundo.

Anyway.

Matagal nang gustong pumunta ni tatay sa Corregidor Island. Ngayong Father's day, pinlano niya ang isang family outing na matagal-tagal na rin naming hindi nagagawa, simula nang maging busy ang lahat sa kanya-kanyang buhay (at si tatay ang pinaka-busy sa lahat). Alas-sais ng umaga, kinalampag na kami ni nanay sa aming mga kama. "Gising na, mala-late tayo sa barko, mahal yung ticket, P1,500." YEOW. Sino ba namang hindi didilat ang mata sa kamahalan ng tour? Hindi nakapagtataka iilan lang ang nakakatuntong sa makasaysayang hugis-butete na islang ito, 26 nautical miles ang layo sa Manila Bay, kung saan binigkas ni Gen. MacArthur ang mga katagang "I shall return."

Maraming mga interesanteng tanawin sa isla na tanggulan ng mga dayuhang mananakop. Matatagpuan siyempre ang iba't ibang mga kagamitang pandigma, kabilang na ang mga higanteng kanyon (meron yung nakakapag-360 degree turn, tumataas-baba, etc.); milya-milyang guho ng barracks; lighthouse; memorial shrines (sa sementeryo ng mga Hapon matatagpuan ang isang kakaibang estatwa ni Buddha na may hawak na mga bata tulad ni Birheng Maria; isang pagtangkang ipagsama ang dalawang relihiyon); guho ng ospital kung saan tinugis ang mga biktima ng Jabidah massacre noong rehimeng Marcos; cave dugouts ng mga Hapon kung saan tinatago nila ang kanilang suicide boats; lumang sinehan; museo; at higit sa lahat, ang Malinta tunnel.

Ang pagpasok sa Malinta tunnel ang pinaka-cool (at creepy) na karansan sa lahat. Ang lagusan ay sanktuwaryo ng mga sundalo't opsiyal na nagsilbing underground hospital at atrasan ni dating Pangulong Manuel Quezon. Bomb-proof ito, mahaba, at magkakarugtong ang lahat ng mga lagusan. Dito nagpatiwakal ang libu-libong mga Hapon nang kubkubin ng mga Amerikano noong 1945.

Bibo ang tour guide namin. Kahit hindi kasama sa tour, pinapasok niya kami sa mga maliliit na lagusan, ipinakita ang uka sa sahig at kisame na dulot ng pinasabog na bomba ng mga nag-kamikaze na Hapon. Pinalakad kami sa mga lagusan nang nakasarado ang flashlight, mala-Extra Challenge. Ipinakita ang mga paniki, at mga makikipot na butas na tanging nagbibigay-hangin sa loob ng tila lumalawak na kabaong (binuhusan ng gas ng mga Amerikano ang mga butas na ito upang sunugin ng buhay ang mga Hapones na nagtatago sa loob).

Pagkatapos ng aming side trip nagkaroon ng isang sound and lights show na boring na (tanging special effects ay pagpatay-sindi ng ilaw at konting kagimbal-gimbal na tunog, film showing at simulated dialogue ng mga estatwa), historically-inaccurate pa (tulad ng iba pang mga kuwentong lumalabas sa bibig ng tour guide.

Kainis. Hanggang ngayon, bayani pa ring itinuturing si MacArthur na nagpalaya sa Pilipinas mula sa mga Hapon noong World War II. Na para bang hindi duwag na lumayas nang makatikim ng lintik mula sa kapwa-mananakop, at bumalik na lang upang agawin ang kalayaang binuwisan ng buhay ng libu-libong magigiting na Pilipino. Hanggang ngayon, Philippine-American troops pa rin ang pinararangalan na parang iisang entidad ang mga Pilipino at Kano, na parang walang relasyong mang-aapi at inaapi, na para bang may karapatan ang mga Kano sa Pilipinas tulad ng karapatan ng bawat Pilipino sa kanyang lupang tinubuan!

Bukod sa mga empleyado ng kompanyang nagpapatakbo ng turismo sa Corregidor, walang ibang residente ang isla. Ghost town, ika nga. Hindi lang dahil maraming mga kaluluwa ng giyerang ipinapalagay na namamahay sa mga guho at gubat. Kundi dahil nang lisanin ng mga dayuhan ang lugar makaraang iatras ang direktang pananakop sa bansa, nawalan na ng silbi ang Corregidor. Wala nang mananakop, wala nang ipagtatanggol.

O di kaya, pirmi na tayong nilusob ng mga mananakop na araw-araw nasa palabas sa telebisyon, nasa likod ng mukha ng mga trapo, amo't asyendero, nasa toothpaste na ating ginagamit at ilaw na pinapatay bago matulog. At ang tanggulan ay ang bawat aserong tahanan, bukid, pabrika, na uka-uka sa mga mortar ng araw-araw na bakbakan.

posted by: ilangq at 16:24 | link | comments (3) |
paglalakbay

Cure to 'People Power fatigue'

Press Secretary Ignacio has finally admitted that Gloria Macapagal-Arroyo is a "hated President." After years of trying to defend the regime's corrupted image and consistently failing, saying so must have been such a huge relief. However, after his one shining moment as truthsayer (for which the President must now be boxing his ears out for), he of course had to fall back on the logic of the desperate. He is now engaging all anti-GMA forces on a grand dare: Bakit, may ipapalit ba kayo?

He pointed out the distasteful array of choices before the Filipino people in terms of leadership change: the former President Joseph Estrada who is up to his neck with plunder charges, actor and FPJ loyalist Rex Cortez, coup-hungry Ret. Gen. Fortunato Abat, among others.

Won't a President who cheated massively in the elections, whose family accepts millions in jueteng payola, who signed the burdensome E-VAT into law, who reinstalled Martial Law in the countryside, be better anyway than these odious personalities?

By posing the "who" question of succession as the ultimate determinant of whether Arroyo gets booted out of office or not, Malakanyang has just achieved two things.

First, it has practically pleaded guilty to the sins brought before the President. By conjecturing on her own replacement, Arroyo has successfully been forced a glimpse down the deep dark well the people might soon throw her into.

Secondly, it resoundingly confirms what a lot of people have known and spurned-- that musical chairs of power among the ruling elite is an exercise in futility. That the names they have been writing in ballots for the past decades have been hoax agents of change and development. And like the average Filipino existence, the veneer of democracy is a forced "kapit sa patalim" situation.

There is an interesting term the Arroyo government coined to justify its longer existence: that of "People Power fatigue." The theory is that people are tired of the bloodless revolts that simply change government heads but achieve no lasting change.

It is true that Estrada, Cortez, or Abat won't fare any better and in all probability even fare worse than Arroyo. But unfortunately for the President, the concept of People Power has changed since EDSA I and II. People just do not believe anymore that a single leader, no matter how credible or pro-poor he or she purportedly is, can single-handedly turn around this country.

A lot may still harbor the FPJ-type of belief in heroism (we are, after all, culturally stunted by centuries of oppression). But most have been let down far too often and far too painfully for them to continue to adhere to the concept of saviour leadership.

Church leaders and militant sectoral organizations are now looking at a council of transitional governance -- a body that consists of all sectors of society (workers, peasants, women, youth, etc), all religious sects (Catholic, Protestant, Muslim, etc), all political parties (traditional and progressive), who will accomodate each other and try to institute changes more significant than what a one-man/one-party reactionary rule has achieved.

The council must necessarily be patriotic in nature, since almost everyone (except the government and big business) agree that monopoly capitalism under the guise of globalization has mired this country into shocking poverty.

If broad forces can muster up such a council as a viable alternative, people won't hesitate about flooding the streets once again for that People Power, which, despite its limitations, is still a liberating effort of blood, sweat, and tears that Filipinos are really proud of.

In any case, whatever happens to this swelling tide against the Arroyo regime, whether it soon conquers or will yet temporarily recede, this so-called "People Power fatigue" will fail to set in. Diagnosing the people as a tired bunch giving up their right to live in dignity and freedom is like prescribing mass suicide, a prognosis unnatural to the great human spirit.

The fact that thousands of Filipinos have been sacrificing their lives for the last 30 plus years, waging war for the communist ideal, is enough proof that for the oppressed who have next to nothing to live for, to struggle is life itself.

posted by: ilangq at 09:59 | link | comments (3) |
political chuvachuva

Toast to Tori

Recently, I heard the acoustic version of Tori Amos' Sleeps with Butterflies on radio. Initially I got excited hearing the classic Tori-piano combo, but realized during the middle of it that the song sounded awkward acoustic. I like Sleeps with Butterflies -- sweet and haunting, I didn't mind much that some call it  too "commercial." Hearing it played acoustic, though, it dawned on me how much of a regular song it really sounded like. It lacked the rawness that a Tori acoustic required.

About a month ago, I found an article on the Internet entitled "Notes of a former Tori Amos freak." Basically, the writer told of how Tori's mellowed music now is a far cry from her old "piano-humping" songs. How her awesome confessional songs affected him deeply back when he was an angsty teenager, and how he has grown since. The article also observed accurately enough how Tori has grown since (getting married and having a child after two miscarriages), and how this has reflected in her music.

I posted the article's link to the Pinoy Tori Amos Fans e-group. It drew such flak that I've been a quiet e-member ever since.

I think Tori's latest album, The Beekeeper, is a great and matured piece from one of the world' s most talented musicians. With that, I do not disagree with the fans.

Still, the article I found articulated honest thoughts that I shared. The Tori now is not the Tori I fell in love with when I was in college. I am not the Tori fan now that I was then, when I would play her albums over and over again-- reveling in the truth hidden in the obscure, beautiful lyricism; finding comfort in her strange syrupy voice; marveling at the hypnotic piano-playing; feeling so close to her honest womanhood; actually crying at some points.

I believe that my being a Tori freak then brought with it a whole set of hyper-sensitive, ultra-feminist attitudes (or rather, it reinforced such attitudes already existing). Attitudes that I am now painfully and slowly trying to unlearn, since they are now way past being helpful, and have actually proven quite debilitating.

Of course, I'll never quite get over having "So you can make me come does that make you Jesus" moods. Or  "I scream in cathedrals, why can't it be beautiful" days. Or "I believe in peace, bitch" frame of mind. And I'll never stop listening to and admiring her songs, old or new.

But I'll never crucify myself to sleep, with her songs as a lullaby, ever again. I think that ultimately, that's meant to be the whole point.

So here's a toast to Tori Amos, the lasting treasures of her music, and moving on...

"Make a toast/ A toast in your honor/ I hear you laugh and beg me not to dance/ 'cause on your right standing by is Mr. Bojangles/ With a toast he's telling me it's time/ To let you go."

(Tori Amos, Toast, The Beekeeper)

posted by: ilangq at 19:07 | link | comments |
popcult madness

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